I'm looking forward to a weekend with other women bloggers. We are gathering in Harrisburg PA for the weekend! I'm out-going and so I love meeting new people! I love hearing their stories and learning about what God has called them to do in life. But, I've not always been this way … Since we are in a society of people who over-share I thought what the heck … let's just write about it.
Internal dialogue #1: I have no idea what to expect … will they like me, will they think what I'm wearing is cute, will they think my new blog is good, will they realize I don't know where to get photos yet, will they figure out I have no idea what I'm doing? I admit that sometimes I have to fight those questions in my thought life. I'm (blank) years old I shouldn't care about that stuff right? But I do.
Internal dialogue 2: I should be transparent and just be myself? But, I think transparency is sometimes used as a way to not have a filter. I'm both transparent and filterless. Is that a word? So, I'm pretty dooomed on coming across as sweet and lovely – which is how I think women should be. But my transparency and filterless personality gets highlighted when I'm meeting new people and nervous. I'm sure to say something that makes me sit in my hotel room and say, “Oh God, make them forget I said that.”
Breakthrough: I remember another time I was going to meet some people at a conference and they were all in the “industry” for a while and I was the new kid. I was telling God I didn't know what people He wanted me to talk to and He said in the sweetest way – “Jill, go to the sessions you like – I made you with giftings and desires that if you follow them will lead you right into the plans I have for you.” Then He said, “I love the way I made you.” I decided I had to agree with God and not my head or even other people. See, when it's not God's thoughts about me or any other subject – it's the enemy. So, I choose to agree with God. He can be trusted and is always right.
So, there you have it. I'm excited about meeting new people this weekend.
Photo courtesy of Allume (new name for Relevant Conference) via Facebook.