It’s the New Year! For so many people it can feel like a fresh start. You’re ready to go for your dreams and make this year even better than years past.

But for others, it brings on timidity and hesitation to have hope because last year didn’t end up the way they believed it would. Things out of your control got in the way of achieving your dreams. You may have isolated yourself because if you did that then nothing more could go wrong.

Or it can be a mix of the two. Belief and doubt. Excitement and hesitation.

Is that you?

I’ve been there too.

A few years ago I had lost all hope for any day, month or year being anything but difficult. I had a couple of years in a row where really painful things happened. I kept believing for things to get better and they only got worse. I started to dread January because I didn’t have hope like everyone else.

In that season, I had a stalker. I moved to a new state and lost my amazing church community. God took people out of my life that I deeply loved. I struggled with being lonely. Everything I was excited about fell apart and favor seemed to disappear. I had my own TV show in development – fell through. The day I was to sign an agreement to be on a major TV speaking tour fell through because the President of the company got let go – that same day! My coaching client list dwindled to 3 people and I didn’t know how I was going to pay the bills. I thought I could handle those things …

I trust God. He’ll never let me down. Just pray.

It didn’t work. I got depressed. Struggled with paralyzing anxiety. Lost half my hair. Gained 20 pounds. My body was screaming at me to listen to what was going on inside.

Things will turn around if I put in some elbow grease too. Work harder. Do more. Figure it out.

So I tried to reconcile with people but they didn’t want to. Friends I reached out to didn’t have time to get together. I saw doctors who didn’t know what was wrong and sent me on my way. My family just felt bad for me and didn’t know what to say.

Darkest time in my life. And I didn’t tell anyone how I cried waking up every morning knowing I had to face another day.

The way I dealt with it was to hide. I hid in my work because having nothing to do meant I had to feel what was going on. I hid relationally and didn’t let anyone know how I was suffering.

I kept going on with my responsibilities and pushed through. I had to get my s*** together because people had signed up for my coaching programs. I had a few speaking gigs on the books and had to show up. In fact, I think that saved me. I applied my own advice. I couldn’t give space for negative thoughts that tortured me.

But I also stopped taking risks because I couldn’t handle one more failure. I stopped trying to do new things for the ministry because of fear of disappointment. I didn’t want to make new friends because I didn’t trust I’d choose ones that wouldn’t eventually hurt me.

And I didn’t want to burden anyone with the details because it was just so much. In one way, sharing only brought focus to it and dragged me down. In another way, I wanted to speak faith over my life.


Cue the mentor I had prayed for. (But at first, didn’t open up to or trust.) He challenged me. Told me what God saw in me. I slowly put my toe in the water. And I found the temperature was different than before. Things were not the same.

Not only did I slowly get better physically but emotionally too.

I was able to share some of my messy thoughts and He didn’t judge me. We didn’t focus on the things that happened but on who I was in God’s eyes. He spoke life over me.

I know that season of hiding served a purpose. God did amazing things in my heart. I think it started out as Him hiding me to protect me and heal me. But eventually, I made it my new normal. When it was only meant to be a season.


All of a sudden after one mentorship call – I got this holy righteous gumption. It was like I came out of my hidden cave and roared. The winter was over and I came out refreshed and stronger.

Its like I HAD to release the message of loving well. Not only loving God but ourselves and others. I’ve always talked about it. It’s on my website, the intro/closing to my podcast and foundational to the way I coach.

My walk with God started getting stronger. I heard Him more clearly. Things started bubbling up that I needed to say. The prophetic was more accurate. I started taking risks and wasn’t afraid of the response. I started writing again and things I invested in started to bear fruit right away.

Again, all because of unconditional love through a mentorship relationship.

Why I Share This

One, because I feel like there are people out there that need to know the season of hiding is over. If you step out you will see it. But you can’t tell if you are hiding. People need what you have. And what you have is precious and powerful. The doors are open for 2019 and you NEED to walk through them!

Second, I want to help you navigate this next season. If you let me, I’ll be your virtual mentor. I invite you to join me by subscribing to my ministry email list where you’ll get things not posted on my website. I will also be posting things on my website once a week either by podcast or blog and I’d love for you to get what God is releasing in this new year.

Third, I want to be that mentor for you.


I have been developing this program for months. I have prayed for those of you that will join me. We will walk through topics God taught me along my journey … from being hidden and uncertain to unhindered and unafraid. We will explore what it means to connect with God, get rid of lies and replace them with truth, set goals for 2019 and more. 

Become who you were created to be!

I’m limiting it to 10 people so that I can invest in you! We will meet as a group twice a month for 6 months, build community, have partners, teaching, coaching, homework, and prayer. I’m also looking into a celebration and get together in person at the end of the program.

I’m excited about the new things God is doing and the messages He wants me to share. And I have a fresh energy to release … not build. To connect not hide. To advance and accelerate the Kingdom of God! I hope you will join me! 


I look forward to connecting with you and making 2019 the best year ever!

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